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the mommyhood memos

Thursday, August 19, 2010

do you have a special "sleepy time" song for your baby?

sweet swaddled sleeping boy at five days old
{something about this shot always cracks me up}
Since becoming a mom I have discovered a previously untapped talent: song-writing.

In our house, as I would imagine in yours, songs come in very handy... to comfort, to distract, to solicit a giggle, to play, to entertain. Usually they are made up on the spot, but others are a little more intentional.

One of the times we made-up a special song for is sleepy time - both naps times and bedtime. It's part of our "wind-down" routine and helps to communicate to Levi that it's time to transition from play to sleep. We've been singing it to him before every nap and bedtime since he was a newborn.

It is set to the tune of "twinkle, twinkle little star" and the words go like this:

Now I lay me down to sleep,
Pray the Lord my soul to keep.
Bless my momma, daddy, and me...
All my friends and fam-i-ly.
When I sleep I'll dream of you,
(And) all that's good and pure and true.

So as you can see it's a bedtime song and prayer combined. Short, sweet, and easy.

Dear mommy-friends... just a little something from our home to yours today. Do you have a special song that is used for bedtime, cleaning up the toys, bath time, etc? 




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adriel booker | the mommyhood memos | 2010 
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Wednesday, July 14, 2010

these are a few of my favorite things {sweet, sweet baby}


Five months old. As tough an age as this is in some ways (can anyone say teething, developmental leaps, and nap time dramas?), this is by far the best age yet. SO. MUCH. FUN. 

Here are just a few of the reasons why:

1.            Pulling off for a moment while nursing just to look up at me and smile before continuing on with business as usual.
{OhMeltMyHeart.}

2.            Being able to toss baby in the air during playtime.
{WeeeItsSuperbaby!}

3.            Helping momma by putting his legs up in the air and lifting his bum while getting a diaper change.
{SoFreakingCute.}

4.            Toes in the mouth!
{EnoughSaid.}

5.            When being held by someone else in a crowded room… turning his head to make eye contact with me when he hears my voice.
{NewMommyGushing.}

6.            Uncontrollable baby giggles when I say anything with an excited expression and raised eyebrows.
{WhyHelloTherePoopyPants!}

7.            That look of wonder and awe when he watches mommy and daddy eating “big boy food.”
{PleaseLetMeHaveSomeNowMomma!}

8.            The “drunken sailor wobbling hula” when he practices standing up while holding onto my hands.
{DontGainYourBalanceTooQuicklyCauseMommasLovingThis.}

9.            Thirty-second 360’s on his tummy.
{WhenTheHeckDidYouGetSoFast?!}

10.        Screams of delight when being mildly (deliberately) startled.
{WhoKnewPeekabooCouldBeSoHilarious?}

11.        The frustrated arm-waiving when throwing a fit.
{FunnyExceptForThoseTimesWhenMommyIsSuperTiredAndOverIt.}

12.        Having his arms stretched out to me when he wants to be picked up.
{IsItWrongThatISometimesPutHimDownJustSoHeCanDoItAgain?}

13.        Head resting on my shoulder and super sweet cuddles when he first wakes up from naptime.
{GetsMeEveryTime.}

14.        The skin… oh, the skin.
{ICantStopTouchingYourChubbyLittleThighs.}

15.        That little baby sigh of relief and pleasure that comes about thirty seconds after nursing has begun.
{TooCuteForYourOwnGood.}

16.        The after-bath hair styles.
{ThankYouDaddy.}

17.        That priceless look of “I-just-accomplished-an-incredible-trick-did-you-see-that?” while making splashes in the bath and saturating daddy.
{YesSweetPeaMommysProudOfYou.}

18.        Being able to sing baby to sleep in five minutes tops if he’s crying in the car due to over-tiredness.
{IKnewIShouldHaveBeenARecordingArtist...ButWhyDoesntThisWorkAtBedtime?}

19.        You know those sneezes that start and then stop mid-sneeze? Baby’s getting those.
{LittleManIsSoFunny.}

20.          When babe sticks his thumb in his mouth while nursing... thinking more is better?
{YouKnowThatIKnowYoureDoneEatingWhenYouDoThatRightSon?}

21.          The paci is no longer for sucking and calming but for chewing and playing.
{SoothieTurnedTeether2For1Deal.}

22.           Those precious moments while nursing that babe reaches up to touch my face or to stroke my chest.
         {PleaseBurnTheseIntoMyMemoryForever.}

Dear mommy friends, I could have gone on and on with this list! Don’t we have so much to enjoy and be thankful for? What are your favorite things about your child at his/her current age?



P.S. For any of you following me that read Dear Nap Time, I've just gotta report back. Two days of perfect naps since then. Can't believe I'm doing this but... kudos to the postal system! That letter was received! {*grin*} I'll keep that in mind for next time.

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Tuesday, July 6, 2010

clicking my way to be a better mom: the chronicles of a babywise mom (part 2 of 3)

I am, no doubt, an internet-loving mommy. As I said in clicking my way to be a better mom, part 1 (featuring the baby whisperer), I love and appreciate having the information of the world at my fingertips... especially when it comes to getting better equipped about parenting.

I wanted to continuing sharing with you my top three favorite internet resources. These are my most well-clicked and loved mommyhood resources. (If you missed Part 1 on how much I love the Baby Whisperer Message Boards, make sure to check it out too and then visit the BW message boards.)

Now, for my second favourite resource site: The Chronicles of a Babywise Mom.

This is a blog started by a mom who follows the Babywise methods of sleep training. She started her blog after scouring the web for resources to expound on some of the principles taught in the Babywise series of books… and not finding any. As a woman who’s had a lot of success implementing the Babywise strategies with her three children, she’s able to write endless “how to’s” (with the authority that comes from experience and success!) that the books could never have contained unless they were far, far too long.

Although I am not a Babywise “follower” myself, I’ve had lots of friends go the Babywise route (for sleep training their babies) and sing of its praises. The Chronicles of a Babywise Mom covers anything and everything you’d like to know about the Babywise method of sleep training… but also so much more: tantrums, reflux, high chair manners, teething, milestones, feeding issues, discipline, diapering, staying sane as a stay-at-home-mom, and the list goes on!

She has a huge list of labels down her side-bar that cover an incredible array of topics, and I have spent many an hour clicking through them even before I became a “blogger” myself. (And this is actually one thing I really love about her site – it’s a great resource for any mom, even those who aren’t into blogging.)

The Babywise Mom also has posts week-by-week about her children’s development and milestones so you can follow along and compare with your own little one’s progress. (And I’ve never seen someone record so meticulously… and yet still manage to not sound tedious!) I found these really interesting and helpful as a first-time-mom always wanting to know if what we were experiencing was “normal”. Especially during my first two months as a mom when I had questions about everything, it was nice reading from a real-live woman at times, rather than just organization websites like What to Expect (which of course is always great too).

The only drawbacks to her site are that it is a little weighed down with gismos along the side bars, which can slow page-loads down a bit, and she doesn’t have as many photos as I’d like (which is really just a personal preference). However, because her site is quite information-driven, I can look past these things since the content is more than worth it to me.

Oh, I should also mention, she does post back (directly on her blog) to her readers’ comments when they have questions in regards to specific problems they’re having with their kids. I understand the wait-time for a response is two weeks, which she’s clear and up-front about this (another thing I like). I’ve not had personal experience with soliciting tailored advice since I visit her site much more like I would a website (informational resource) rather than the way I approach blogs. But as I’ve read comments from other readers, and her responses back to them, I can tell that they are served tremendously by her help.

Overall the Babywise Mom writes good, practical information and always relates back to her readers, even those who aren't "Babywise parents" in philosophy. She does not push the Babywise sleep training methods for those that aren’t into CIO (although teaches well for those that do), and she offers outstanding advice for any mom on so many subjects. I’d highly recommend for you to have a browse around her site.

The "clicking my way to be a better mom" series:
If you missed part one of this series, you can read it here – clicking my way to be a better mom: the baby whisperer (part 1 of 3). My final post in this series (for now) will be – clicking my way to be a better mom: the kelly mom (part 3 of 3).

In closing…
I’m sure as my son gets older I will find other resources that are age-appropriate on things like discipline, creative play and learning activities, etc., but for now these are my top three visits on the world wide web for practical help in caring for my baby.

Dear mommy-friends, what are your favourite online resources that have helped you care for your little one(s)?



P.S. Until becoming a mom for myself I had no idea how controversial "sleep training" is! I know amazing parents who have polar opposite philosophies when it comes to things like scheduling, feeding on demand, cry-it-out, and so on. My intention is not to debate which is better than the other - I've seen these parents with hugely differing philosophies raise well-adjusted, happy, healthy kids and I'm of the firm belief that each family needs to decide what's best for them. I personally believe you should research a bunch of different philosophies and then piece together what fits with your values, personality, circumstances, etc. etc! As you will see through all three parts in this series, I think you can find incredible truth and practical help from an array of angles.

[Above photo: momma, daddy, and Levi at just a few hours old on our first night together... love. x]


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Saturday, July 3, 2010

clicking my way to be a better mom: the baby whisperer (part 1 of 3)

I love and appreciate the internet. But since becoming a mom, I have grown to love and appreciate the internet so much more! Having the advice of the world at my fingertips makes it hard for me to imagine how our mothers did without it. I’ve looked up everything from how to take my baby’s temperature to the scientific reason for drool, from baby names to baby fashion, baby food recipes, methods to help my baby sleep, how to increase my milk supply… and everything in between.

I wanted to share with you my top three faves – and most well-clicked and loved – internet resources on mommyhood. 

Now, for my top resource site: The Baby Whisperer Message Boards.

I am a huge Baby Whisperer fan. If you haven’t read the books by Tracy Hogg, then I highly recommend you do so. She talks about communication with your baby, understanding their body language, how to establish healthy eating patterns and sleep patterns, teaching them to fall asleep on their own, and a myriad of other topics including how to care for yourself post-partum. Sadly, since authoring her books on babies and toddlers, Tracy has passed away, but her legacy lives on through the BW message boards.

These message boards are free to use and have literally thousands of posts from moms on everything related to caring for your baby: breast and bottle feeding, naptimes, how to deal with night wakings or early morning wakings, helping your baby learn to sleep without props, surviving growth spurts, age-appropriate developmental activities, and so many other things. The site is powered by a few volunteer moderators and thousands of moms – both veterans and rookies alike.

Moms can surf through the posts and see if others have already posted about their particular issues, or you can post any problem you’re trying to work through with your baby or toddler, and other moms will come and help you with their advice and what worked for them, offering suggestions for you to try. (Of course it’s all based off the techniques which Hogg taught in her Baby Whisperer books, which among other things advocates a form of sleep training minus the cry-it-out method.)

I have had some incredible “mommy mentors” that have helped me day-by-day to figure out and tweak my routine in order to help my little guy learn to sleep without any props (ie: paci, being rocked to sleep, etc.) and also to help him take longer naps. This was a huge help to me as Levi used to always take 30-minute naps and wake up cranky and still tired, yet awake enough to not be able to fall back asleep.

Levi’s sporadic sleep patterns were actually causing me a significant amount of stress during my first few months with him and I’d spend most of my brain power during the day (and often lying in bed awake at night) wondering how to problem-solve and “fix” things so he would get some sleep and be his happy little self. (Cause we all know an over-tired baby becomes a grumpy and demanding baby!)

I went ‘round and ‘round trying to figure it all out and found I just needed help. The experienced moms on the BW boards proved to be an invaluable resource and encouragement to me during some very rocky weeks trying to help my babe sleep well.

They helped me to look at every aspect of my patterns with him, suggested corrections where I needed them, affirmed me when things were working, cheered for me when I wanted to give up, and talked sense into me when we would take a few steps back and I’d blame myself.

At the end of the day these ladies have helped me learn to take care of my son better and successfully see him taking good, consistent naps during the day and sleep well during the nights… leaving him happy and full of life and energy, and leaving me much more sane! Let’s just say my whole family has benefited hugely from the Baby Whisperer. Check it out and join the Baby Whisperer community.

To be continued:
In order to keep this post more readable, I’ve broken it into three parts which will continue over the next few days. Parts two and three of the "clicking my way to be a better mom" series will be:
2) The Chronicles of a Babywise Mom
3) The Kelly Mom

In closing…
I’m sure as my son gets older I will find other resources that are age-appropriate on things like discipline, creative play and learning activities, etc., but for now these are my top three visits on the world wide web for practical help in caring for my baby.

Dear mommy-friends, what are your favourite online resources that have helped you care for your little one(s)?




P.S. Until becoming a mom for myself I had no idea how controversial "sleep training" is! I know amazing parents who have polar opposite philosophies when it comes to things like scheduling, feeding on demand, cry-it-out, and so on. My intention is not to debate which is better than the other - I've seen these parents with hugely differing philosophies raise well-adjusted, happy, healthy kids and I'm of the firm belief that each family needs to decide what's best for them. I personally believe you should research a bunch of different philosophies and then piece together what fits with your values, personality, circumstances, etc. etc! As you will see through my next two parts in this series, I think you can find incredible truth and practical help from an array of angles.

[Above photo: momma and one-day-old Levi still in the hospital... love. x]

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Monday, May 17, 2010

oh baby, baby... what's that you say?

"This child has lungs!" I'm sure that every parent has had this thought about their wee little one... Perhaps while you stand in line at the supermarket? Or at 3:00am in the morning when you're staying with your in-laws?

They say that communication is key to good relationships, but when it comes to babies that's easier said than done!

Although our bub is not talking yet--as in saying words--he is definitely learning more and more about how to communicate. It's so fun watching him develop his collection of sounds and test out his range, pitch, and vocabulary... if you want to call it that. :)

But it's not only his--uh--verbal exploits that help us understand him, it's also his body language.

Since becoming a mommy, one of my absolute favorite parenting resources has become the Baby Whisperer series by Tracy Hogg. And although I'm not intending to write a complete book review here at the moment, I will say that as I've read her books and browsed the message boards on her website, I've learned soooo much about this whole area of communication with our baby.

One of the basic things she writes about is how important it is to take a step back and listen to our infants - not just how they cry, but what their faces are saying, their arms, their legs, their mouths, their eyes, and their body as a whole. Some of it is very intuitive, some of it is far less obvious, and all of it comes from years of observing thousands of babies. Her books are full of incredible tips about how to decipher your baby's language and--in knowing what they're saying--learn how to care for them better. 

Increasingly I'm learning what Levi is "saying" to me, and that gives me more and more confidence in my ability to meet his needs - something every mommy wants (especially us first-timers).

But communication is a two-way street.

Not only does Hogg give some great tips on how to listen to your baby and learn what he is saying, but she also talks about how to help your baby understand what you are saying. It all comes back to the process of learning two-way communication.

Nearly every mommy I know instinctively talks to their baby about what they're doing (we love those running commentaries, don't we?!). And who doesn't get a thrill out of making "oohs" and "ahhs" other noises back and forth with our precious little people? But as important as those things are, Hogg also points out another level of communication that may not seem as obvious -- namely, how routine can help to communicate to our wee ones what we're doing, what is coming, and what we expect of them.

It's easy to forget that these little ones want to understand us just as much as we want to understand them.

One of things that my husband and I have implemented since reading Hogg's books is to give Levi a wind-down routine before nap times and bedtime. We check his diaper, swaddle him (though he's busting out of his swaddle blankets more and more these days), draw the curtains, read him a story, and then put him in bed. We literally do that for every nap. (And our bedtime routine is similar.) Not only does this help him transition from play time to sleepy time (focusing on the pages and hearing one of us read in a soft, low voice definitely calms him), but it also "tells" him (and prepares him for) what's coming next.

By the end of this little routine he's prepared to be "left" in his crib and he knows that once his nap is over... mommy (or daddy) will alway come back. It's evident that he understands this because he doesn't cry when we put him down. Nine times out of ten he smiles, chats to himself for a couple of minutes, and then drifts off to la la land. (This wasn't always the case... but more about sleep training in another post!)

Although he can't tell us now, I'm convinced that this short, simple routine has helped him understand what's happening in his little world... which in turn helps him settle and know what role he has in it all. I believe it helps him feel at peace and secure.

It's helped me too. I'm learning how to respect the fact that my baby is a little person and that--even at this tender young age--he needs some level of understanding, as minimal as it may be.

As a parent, it's a given that I want my children to be grow up and learn how to be obedient to us. I want them to follow our instructions and trust our decisions for them. But I also want them to grow up feeling like mommy and daddy have taken the time to communicate with them - the why's, the how's, and the what for's (when it's relevant and age-appropriate of course). We want them to be raised in a family that communicates--not just instructs--and we believe that there's no such thing as starting too early with instilling and modeling these principles.

It comes down to valuing the individual and demonstrating love and respect toward people... yes, even little children. (*gasp*)

All that to say... we do a lot of talking to our baby and we do a lot of listening. We're trying to become parents who are experts at communication, not just with each other, but also with our children. We've got a lot to learn, and some days are harder than others when it comes to understanding what Levi is "saying", but it feels good to know that we're positioned to grow.

And.... having said all of that... of course we love to practice our "ooo-ing" and "ahh-ing" and gurggling with our son as well. That part of communicating is important too.... and so much fun!!

This is a "conversation" I had with our adorable Levi about three or four weeks ago on his three-month-birthday:



Here's to the joy and struggle in the process of learning how to communicate with our kids!

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Monday, May 10, 2010

baby faves: swaddleme blankets

Love, love, love these Swaddleme blankets by both Kiddopotamus and by Summer. As most new mommies know, little babes love to be swaddled. The theory goes that it makes them feel more cozy and secure and helps create a womb-like environment for them. Mommies love swaddling because it keeps bub’s arms from flailing about as they drift off into sleep (especially when the “startle reflex” hits) and that means they will fall asleep faster and stay asleep for longer. I love Swaddleme blankets because they velcro close! When Levi was first born it was easy to swaddle him tightly in any blanket, but after a few weeks he became a little Houdini and could always work his way out (inevitably cutting his naps short). With the Swaddleme blanket, that was solved. He wore the size small until about two-and-a-half months until he started working out how to escape that one too (as you can see by my tarzan-baby photo), and now he sleeps in the large size. Love these!!

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